


A Melodramatic Asshole's Ruminations

by TheMightyThunderCrapper



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Also I just really like that word rumination, Depression, Everyone's alive, I feel the need to mention that every character is mentioned and that's it, I'm bad with tags sorry, Post-Sgrub, Rumination
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-15
Updated: 2014-07-15
Packaged: 2018-02-08 23:43:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 943
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1960710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheMightyThunderCrapper/pseuds/TheMightyThunderCrapper
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eridan being a melodramatic asshole and ruminating on his past.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Melodramatic Asshole's Ruminations

Really, you fucked up. You had everything. You could even go so far as to say that you had it all. Looking back, each and every one of your mistakes is staring you down just like that creepy-ass juggalo did before Kanaya... yeah, let's not relive that. Again.

Although, all of your mistakes can be traced back to a time that was better for you, back before this stupid game had a chance to start. Back when you could call someone your quadrant, your moirail, before she ditched you for some pissblooded mutant freak. Back before you wiped out an entire planet of consorts who, in total honesty, had done nothing wrong and would most likely have helped you out tremendously. Back before the meteor. 

Back when the spiderbitch started ignoring you, you were mostly angry at the fact that she was holding out on you. The goddamn conniving backstabbing chick owed you a doomsday device, which was probably rigged to explode anyway, thinking back. It wouldn't be excessively out of character for her to do. Anyway, you just decided to wait to talk to her about it once you were in the game, because like the idiot you've proven yourself to be, you didn't realize that you might be mere centimeters away from losing your moirail.

You told her how you felt. She told you how she felt. She left you then, and aside from some very polite catching up in three-minute conversations, you never talked to her in earnest until that time on The Veil. You challenged the lowblooded fuckwit to a challenge. He beat you. You ran away in record time. It's more than likely he laughed at you for it, and she laughed right alongside him in that wavery, sort of high-pitched laugh when she thought something was kind of funny but felt bad for laughing about it, the sort of thing you wouldn't really pick up on unless you knew her moderately well. 

On the meteor, things didn't look even remotely, almost kind of sort of better. Between being trapped on this rock and waiting for the demon to find you and having to deal with Karkat's usual pedabtic bullshit, you decided to solicit two of the humans. The lavender one, pretending to be a mighty wizard or some shit even though magic is complete and utter fucking bullshit, would have made a good rival. Assuming she hadn't blown a computer up in your face. Still, one of the events that launched you in a triple backflip off the deep end was the one with the green text, and her total disregard for what is without any doubt the strongest weapon for riflekind, and where does she get off in thinking that she can just pull some sort of stunt like that? Not that it made any difference in the final course of events.

You took off through the meteor, cursing and thinking on how you might be able to get out of this tactical clusterfuck of nuclear time bombs. And now you wonder what the FUCK you were thinking, deciding to join Jack like that. No matter what, you weren't going to just leave Feferi there to fend for herself. You talked to her about it, while Captor interjected his worthless horseshit. You got tired of hearing him, and challenged him to another duel, this time coming out the clear champion with your powerful wand of science. He smashed into a far wall. Feferi turned on you with a snarl, and this is the point where time froze for you. You stopped thinking. Why the fuck did you stop thinking? You raised your arm. She lunged. You fired. She died. Because of your fucking worthless, no good, brainless, irresponsible, idiotic decision to go join the team you thought would win. Of course, you being you, you were wrong. Dead wrong, in fact. After a time, Lord English showed his ugly mug and blasted Jack into oblivion, including Harley and that white Jack. Strider chose this moment to turn into the true represnetation of his lusus, and pulled some timey shit to stab the fucker in the back of his neck, cutting the neck to where the head just flopped to one side, red blood pouring out. 

We all came back then, everyone who had died. It turned out that Lord English was the real boss of the game, and the reason for so few successful sessions is because he's nearly goddamn impossible to beat. The Serket from Beforus decided to rant about that before getting clocked in the mouth, which you thought was pretty fucking hilarious. You haven't talked to anyone really, no reason to considering Kanaya got revenge for blowing up the Matriorb and you'd apologized to Fef when you were in that abominatiom of a sprite that Makara, in his infinite shitty clown wisdom, had thrown your body into with Captor of all people. And you know what? You still managed to fuck up. You made dear sweet precious Fefetasprite explode, and fuck all if you didn't get angrier at yourself when it happened. 

When your sprite blew apart, you just vanished. No one had any idea where you went, and you're okay with that. For the most part you haven't even bad sad, at least. It's more of an omnipresent feeling of emptiness, soul-crushing apathy. You shoudld probably grab something to eat soon, it's been a while since you got out of bed. No one's going to check on you anytime soon, so there really isn't much point to it. Oh well. Maybe you'll just go to sleep. You are pretty tired, after all...

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this because I've wanted to see something in this vein for a long time now, and since I couldn't find a fic with Eridan that doesn't involve relationships in some way, I decided to go ahead and write my own. I apologize if it isn't exactly skillfully written, but I'm tired as hell and using my phone to post this.


End file.
